Lead with Purpose: Start with Your Personal Why
Why am I here?
It's an overwhelming question, one that’s both haunted and motivated humans for thousands of years. But it’s not just philosophical. It’s instinct. We’re wired to search for purpose. To need it. To make meaning out of our existence.
And when that sense of meaning fades (or when we can’t find it in the first place), we start to question what it’s all for. Why we’re doing what we’re doing, both personally and professionally. If we can’t find a clear answer, we lose clarity and direction.
We burn out. We disengage. We get cynical.
And to cope, we grasp for anything that mimics meaning: overwork, distraction, control.
It’s not weakness. It’s a natural response to feeling like we don’t have any real purpose. Which is why finding your personal Why — not your company mission, not your five-year plan, but your lived sense of purpose — isn’t a luxury. It’s foundational.
In Part 1 of the Why Series, we explored five reasons your Why matters now more than ever. How it creates energy, alignment, and resilience. How it helps teams grow through change and build something that endures.
This article takes a deeper look at what drives each of us personally. Because a Compelling Why isn’t just something you craft for your company. It has to start with you. We’ll explore the role personal meaning plays in your life and your ability to lead — and I’ll share clear steps for you to begin to uncover your own Why, not as a branding exercise but as the backbone of a life worth building.
Resilience Begins with Your Why
Think about this for a second: When things feel like they're falling apart — when the plan doesn’t work, when the market shifts, when the weight of leadership starts to feel like too much — what keeps you from walking away?
It’s not strategy. It’s not even support.
It’s a reason to keep going. That's your Why.
People who know why they’re here don’t crumble as easily when they face adversity. They absorb the hit, learn what they need to learn, and keep building.
Not because they’re superhuman. But because their suffering serves something greater than the moment. Austrian neurologist, psychologist, and author Viktor Frankl survived four Nazi concentration camps and later wrote that the people who endured weren’t necessarily the strongest or smartest. They were the ones who had a reason — something to live for beyond themselves.
Purpose doesn’t erase pain or hardship. But it does have the power to transform it. It gives shape to the chaos. It says, “This matters. Keep going.”
That’s resilience. Not just grit or willpower, but the ability to move through hard things without losing yourself. Or worse, forgetting why you started in the first place.

Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.

Viktor Frankl
Don't Mistake Motion for Meaning
You don’t need purpose to be busy. Or driven. Or even successful.
But when you’re moving fast without a clear Why, things often start to go sideways. You make decisions out of pressure instead of conviction. You chase goals you don’t actually care about. You move just to keep moving.
On the outside, this can still look like progress, but more often than not, it leads to burnout.
We see it in high achievers who collapse after hitting their goals. We see it in motivated people whose drive starts to poison their health, their relationships, or their sense of self. We see it in companies that scale fast but stall out because no one remembers why they started.
Without a clear Why, even the most talented or driven people lose direction and energy.
Which is why we need to treat our personal Why as a discipline, so your drive can build something that lasts.
Your Why Has to Evolve — and It Has to Be Yours
Your personal Why isn’t something you figure out once and carry forever. It changes because you change. Your context, capacity, and calling evolve, and so should your sense of purpose.
Here’s the catch: Too many people operate from a Why they never truly chose. Early on, we’re taught what matters: security, success, status, approval. We learn how to belong by chasing what we’re told to chase. And for a while, it works.
But eventually, the things that once gave your Work meaning can start to feel hollow. The choices you made that previously aligned with your values may now conflict with them. Or maybe you realize those were never your values at all. They were someone else's. That doesn’t mean you were wrong. It means you’ve grown.
And if you keep leading from an outdated or borrowed Why, it starts to take a toll on both you and your company.
That’s why you need to come back to your Why regularly. What matters most now? Where do you want to spend your energy? What’s worth the weight of your time and decisions?
Because your Why can’t be inherited or outsourced. It has to be self-chosen. Built by you, for you.
This is the Work. It’s personal. Sometimes uncomfortable. But always worth it. Because your answers shape how you lead and who you become.
How to Uncover Your Personal Why
So how do you start clarifying something as big and personal as your Why? Not by forcing it. But by asking better questions, being honest, and listening closely to the answers.
Think of this as a personal excavation. You’re tuning in to what’s already there, beneath the surface of the day-to-day.
Let's walk through five steps that can help you get started.
Step 1: Reflect on what matters.
Block off some time in your calendar to answer these five questions:
- What problem do I feel responsible for helping to solve?
- When do I feel most alive, useful, or proud?
- What kind of impact do I want to have that outlives me?
- Who am I willing to sacrifice comfort for?
- What would break my heart to leave unfinished?
Write freely. No editing, no overthinking. These aren’t checklist items. They’re entry points — ways of paying attention to what actually matters. Your answers don’t need to be perfect. They just need to be honest.
Step 2: Look for patterns, not perfection.
Leave your answers to sit for a while. After a few days, come back to your notes. Read through your responses. What keeps showing up? What themes feel emotionally charged — either exciting or uncomfortable?
Circle the phrases or ideas that feel central. These are the threads of your Why.
And don't waste time overanalyzing or trying to fit everything into a tidy answer. You’re not writing a mission statement. You’re simply tuning into the parts of you that already know what matters. The patterns don’t have to be clean. They just have to be real.
Step 3: Write a rough draft of your Why.
This isn’t your final answer. It’s a working version — something you can live with, test, and evolve over time.
Try starting with a simple sentence: I’m here to…
Then finish it using the patterns you noticed. Keep it short and sharp. You’re aiming for clarity, not poetry.
And don’t worry if it feels incomplete or imperfect. The goal is to name something true enough to guide you and flexible enough to grow with you.
Step 4: Pressure test your Why in real life.
Live with it for a few weeks. See how it shows up when things get messy or unclear.
Does it hold up under stress? Does it help you make decisions? Can you say yes or no with more confidence? Can you better direct your energy where it matters most?
If not, tweak it. This is a process of tuning, not declaring. Your Why should work like a compass to guide you.
Step 5: Use it. Build around it.
Once your personal Why feels resonant and useful, anchor it. Put it somewhere visible. Return to it when you’re setting priorities or facing tough calls.
Let it guide how you build your business, lead your team, and shape your Work.
Because the real power of a clear Why isn’t just in having it. It’s in using it to shape the decisions, relationships, and structures that define your life and your company.
Build the Foundation First
You can’t build a high-performing company if you're disconnected from your own reason for being.
As founders and leaders, we have to take responsibility for ourselves first. Not in a selfish way. In a foundational one.
Because if you don’t have a clear sense of your personal Why, you’ll either fold when things get hard or cling too tightly to the wrong things. You’ll track the wrong outcomes. Chase the wrong kind of success.
This isn’t self-help. It’s direction. It's purpose.
Many thinkers, from Viktor Frankl to Simon Sinek, have shaped how we talk about that purpose. And their insights have helped millions start the journey of uncovering their personal Why. In the next part of this series, I’ll dive into some of these perspectives. I'll share where I agree, where I part ways, and what I’ve come to believe about purpose after decades of building, leading, and coaching others.
Because once you understand your Why, everything else gets clearer. Including where to go next.